Gaining Self Confidence

Self-Confidence and the Things that Undermine It

One of the key aspects regarding personal growth is learning how to gain (or regain) one’s self-confidence.  Along with our self-esteem which also goes hand in hand with our self-confidence, nothing in our lives is encounters more “knocks” in life than our self-confidence.  Unfortunately, most of us are unaware of the fact that we need to reassess our levels of self-confidence and continually work on rebuilding them.  Additionally, the many situations in life that we deal with on a day-to-day basis are affected by our level of self-confidence.

Interestingly enough, we may be confident in the interpersonal relationships we encounter in our social lives, but lack confidence in our career environment (and vice-versa).  It is obvious then, that when you work on your self-confidence, that you need to endeavor to work on it from all angles, not just in one specific area.

The lack of self-confidence can originate from a variety of sources.  These include:

  • Bad situations in your life that haven’t been confronted or dealt with in a proper fashion<
  • Influences from parental and peer figures
  • Past childhood experiences


The bottom line is that you need to start working on your levels of self-confidence NOW!

The Hard and Fast Rule about Self-Confidence

Gaining self-confidence comes from building self-confidence – pure and simple.  And the only hope you have of doing this comes from the ability to discover and uncover those past experiences mentioned in the section above.  Self-appreciation is another one of the key concepts that you can employ in order to accomplish this.  Self-discovery and self-inventory are key ways in which you get to know the true person that you are and therefore be able to value yourself.  It not only helps to improve the confidence you have in yourself, it is also the most ideal way to improve your self-esteem and self-worth.

3 Initial Steps to Improving Self-Confidence

Although there are many schools of thought regarding the improvement of self-confidence, the following are the 3 initial steps that you need to take in order to get on the right track:

1 – In order to start building (or re-building) your self-confidence, you need to learn how to value yourself as a person. Most individuals today set out to build or rebuild their self-confidence without placing value on themselves.  In order to start in the most effective manner, you need to be aware of your best qualities by knowing who you truly are as a human being.

If you are unsure what it is that you admire and like about yourself, then take the time to reflect on the positive qualities of what you feel you are all about.  Ask yourself the following 2 questions:

  • What do you consider to be your greatest strengths and weaknesses?
  • What is it that makes you so good at certain things while you cannot succeed at others?
  • What makes you a unique individual?


Make a hand-written list of these questions, carry it around with you, and read it everyday for the next 30 days.  This is the first thing that you need to do in order to start building or re-building your self-confidence.

2 – Think positively about you, regardless. You cannot start working on your self-confidence if you are constantly thinking negatively about yourself.  The most common mistake we make is that we continually compare ourselves to other individuals.  This is very destructive and results in constantly putting yourself down.  People are attracted to one another based on levels of self-confidence of the other person, as well as, being passionate about their lives and what they are doing.  It inspires those around you.  Besides that, when you continually display or voice a negative opinion about yourself, you will make those around you feel uncomfortable in your presence.

3 – Surround yourself with positive individuals that will influence you in a more positive fashion. It’s like the old adage – if you want to be successful, surround yourself with successful people.  To illustrate what we are talking about here, take the time to observe the behavior of confident and positive individuals around you when in a social setting.  We aren’t telling you to copy these individuals, but emulating them is another story.  You’re simply taking on the characteristics of these individuals in order to enhance your personal portfolio and increase your positivity levels.

Additionally, you need to commit and dedicate yourself to building your self-confidence level.  Work on employing those thoughts that are inspiring and uplifting, not self-defeating.  Diving into a book about the lives of inspirational individuals is a great way to get started in this area.  Carefully look at how they have gotten the things they want out of life by overcoming certain obstacles in their lives that initially prevented them from achieving or attaining these things.

Get started on an unstoppable mission to build or re-build your self-confidence!

Actions such as the above will enable you to hit the ground running and start building your self-confidence and creating the type of person that everyone wants to be in the presence of and emulate in the long run.

If you would like to learn more about yourself and how my programs can help you to start regaining your self-confidence, please click here.  I can show you what you need to do in order to build, develop, gain, or improve your self-confidence levels.

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